How do you sign your credit car slips? - Toyota Yaris Forums

Black Yaris · 12-24-2008, 09:46 PM

got this off of my local car forum

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cream

From http://www.drunkrepublic.com

Over the past 6 months, I have been playing a fun game with my credit card company. The game finally backfired on me today and led me through the most hilarious moment of my life. Most people would have been embarrassed, but me, I'm a little twisted, so I laughed all the way through it like an asshole.

With any story, there is a setup process. Here is the setup to this story. About 6 months ago, I was making a purchase with my credit card and when I went to sign the electronic signature machine, it was broken. By broken, I mean that when I touched the pen to the machine, it went crazy and didn't look anything like my signature. It looked like a drunk 4 year old signed my name for me. It accepted the signature without any problems. So this really made me wonder what I could do to give my credit card company something to laugh about. I mean, they obviously don't review the signatures since they never called me or declined a purchase. For fucks sake, it could have been a stolen card.

I started out modest by signing with a line or an "X". Occasionally I would do last name first. After a couple of months, I became bolder. I wrote goofy shit, drew pictures, etc. Here's a list of some of my favorite signatures over the past few months:

I AM NOT ZEB
I STOLE THIS
FUCK OFF
FUCK YOU
WALMART SUCKS
CALL ME
CROTCHY CROTCHINGTON
MY BALLS ITCH
911
I'M A CRIMINAL
THANKS FOR THE STUFF

Today I went the extra mile. When it came time to sign my name, a thought popped in my head. I should draw a picture. But what picture should I draw? I smirked as something completely juvenile came to me. This is a rough drawing of the signature that I provided:

Yes, I know, it's not my best artwork, but I didn't have the time to be elaborate with the drawing. I had to look like I was providing a signature. Right after I hit "OK", there was a pause. The register then said "COMPARE SIGNATURE ON SLIP TO CARD." One thought popped in my head: "OH FUCK!" It then printed the receipt and there in black and white was my shitty drawing of cock and balls. The lady at the register didn't immediately look at it. She asked for the card. I handed her the card and she flipped it over. Then she brought up the receipt and she smirked, but then took a stern tone and said "These signatures don't match."

At this point I was in tears from trying to hold back my laughter. I tried to explain to her why I had done it, but it didn't matter. I probably didn't make sense as I laughed hysterically through the explanation. She then paged the manager and I erupted in laughter. The guy behind me in line got a glimpse of my signature on the receipt and began laughing. The manager comes up and the woman from the register begins whispering to him. I then hear a few words "he drew a penis..." as she holds up the receipt. The manager blurts out a short laugh and then controls it. He turns to me and I'm out of breath from laughing and I'm still giggling like a schoolgirl.

Manager: Sir, your signature...heh...umm...doesn't match the signature on your card.
Zeb: I know and there is a good reason for that.
Manager: (quietly) You drew a penis on my credit card machine.
**The guy behind me bursts into laughter.**
Zeb: Yeah, I didn't think this would happen. I've been trying to see how far I could go with my signature before the credit card company did something about it.
Manager: I guess you learned your lesson.
Zeb: Yeah, the credit card doesn't accept penis.
**The guy behind me now can't stop laughing.**
Manager: OK, I'm going to decline the signature and have you sign it again.
Zeb: Fair enough.
Manager: This time, really sign it.

So I had to sign it again and they wouldn't let me keep my artwork. Those bastards. I had singlehandedly broken up the monotony of their daily routine and given them something that they will be talking about for years to come and they wouldn't let me keep it. They will tell their grandchildren about the guy that drew cock and balls as his credit card signature.

So I have a plan now. I'm going to get a new credit card and sign the back with my cock and balls drawing. Then I will consistently use that as the signature. That way, if I ever get caught in the same situation, the signatures will match. That will really fuck with them.

rningonfumes · 12-24-2008, 09:56 PM

lmao HAHAHAHA

YAR1S · 12-24-2008, 10:14 PM

this made my day. LOL

staypuft · 12-24-2008, 10:35 PM

well my sig rubbed off my card, ill try something like that and see if it werks

LtNoogie · 12-24-2008, 10:38 PM

On some registers, the clerk can see your electronic signature as your scribble it. That would have been fun to see.

mikenacarato · 12-25-2008, 12:02 AM

haha hilarious!

slvryaris · 12-25-2008, 03:23 AM

A friend of mine when we went to the bars would sign his with names like Chuck Steak and Biff Webster and I believe he signed one THIS IS NOT MY NAME.

nemelek · 12-25-2008, 05:05 AM

Funny stuff

TEHxFALLEN V1.2 · 12-25-2008, 05:36 AM

(=

*MAD DOG* · 12-25-2008, 06:51 AM

I used to do stuff like that, make up names and sign like "who cares".

Black Yaris · 12-25-2008, 02:38 PM

I laughed so hard when I read this.... I thought I was going to pee myself

Rain · 12-25-2008, 02:58 PM

hilarious

Shroomster · 12-25-2008, 08:56 PM

lmao I do that all the time...that sig verification is a joke and a waste of time...

so much so I use the chip in the card anymore so I don't have to sign but when I do I just scribble up and down a few times...

the last time I did it I colored in nearly the entire electronic pad on a self service register....the clerk had to come over and she didn't even ask for ID!!! she just entered her info and such and gave me the receipt.....

hell most places I ask if they want to see my ID or my card and alot of them say no so fuck it....

darthbauer · 12-26-2008, 01:00 AM

I usually just sign my name but when I worked at a retail store back in the day a lot of people on the credit card machines would sign by coloring in the whole box. It was annoying cause it took forever for them to finish.

Kaotic Lazagna · 12-26-2008, 01:09 AM

Holy crap, the spaghetti I'm eating just came out of my nose. That's just too funny!

KCALB SIRAY · 12-26-2008, 10:08 AM

I sign mine as :

Harry P. Ness

hatchbackkid82 · 12-29-2008, 03:47 PM

this was great

nypunk · 12-29-2008, 05:50 PM

lol i used to do that to the ups & fed ex guys ... used to do ones like mickey mouse and other fictional characters

12-24-2008, 09:56 PM	#2
rningonfumes Drives: Yaris Sedan 5MT Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: SoCal Posts: 865	lmao HAHAHAHA __________________

12-24-2008, 10:35 PM	#4
staypuft aka SDMF View User's Garage Drives: 07 LB Met Met Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: chicago Posts: 298	well my sig rubbed off my card, ill try something like that and see if it werks __________________ follow me on twitter www.twitter.com/samuryan_x

12-24-2008, 10:38 PM	#5
LtNoogie View User's Garage Drives: '08 Bayou Blue LB AT Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: West Hills, CA Posts: 2,517	On some registers, the clerk can see your electronic signature as your scribble it. That would have been fun to see. __________________ aFe Intake \| Blitz Supercharger \| Megan Header \| TRD Exhaust \| NST Pulley Set TRD Shocks/Struts \| Tanabe NF210 Springs \| TRD Sway Bar \| Motegi TRAKLITE wheels \| Kuhmo Ecsta XS R1 Concepts slotted rotors \| Carbotech 1521 brake pads \| stainless steel brake lines \| Seibon vented carbon fiber hood

12-25-2008, 05:05 AM	#8
nemelek DWEED Drives: 3DR 2008 Metorite Metalic Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Arizona Posts: 1,161	Funny stuff __________________ Making a decision without following it with an action is still a fantasy.

12-25-2008, 05:36 AM	#9
TEHxFALLEN V1.2 Banned View User's Garage Drives: '08 Lexus IS-F Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Calabasas, CA Posts: 1,890	(= __________________ DON'T LIKE ME? TAKE A SEAT WITH THE REST OF THE BITCHES WHO ARE WAITING FOR ME TO GIVE A FUCK. Sponsored by: Micro Image http://microimageonline.com

12-24-2008, 10:14 PM	#3
YAR1S View User's Garage Drives: 07 Yaris 3dr LB (Bayou Blue) Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Raleigh, NC Posts: 2,602	this made my day. LOL

12-25-2008, 12:02 AM	#6
mikenacarato SIPNDEW View User's Garage Drives: 15 STI Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Brentwood, TN Posts: 2,281	haha hilarious!

12-25-2008, 03:23 AM	#7
slvryaris View User's Garage Drives: 2007 Yaris Sedan S Join Date: May 2006 Location: Indiana Posts: 885	A friend of mine when we went to the bars would sign his with names like Chuck Steak and Biff Webster and I believe he signed one THIS IS NOT MY NAME.

12-25-2008, 06:51 AM	#10
MAD DOG Drives: 2011 Toyota Camry Hybrid Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Victoria, Australia Posts: 6,412	I used to do stuff like that, make up names and sign like "who cares". __________________ "Manual labour is not for me. In fact i'm not even sure non manual work is either." -Anthony Linton Check out ▬▬► I like I like ◄▬▬ for more fun on Facebook

12-25-2008, 02:38 PM	#11
Black Yaris der Zeck View User's Garage Drives: '05 Audi A4 1.8t quattro Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Toledo, OH Posts: 5,231	I laughed so hard when I read this.... I thought I was going to pee myself __________________

12-25-2008, 02:58 PM	#12
Rain help! my Yaris shrunk! Drives: 12 Hot Lava iQ/07 Jade Vios Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: SoCal Posts: 1,748	hilarious

12-25-2008, 08:56 PM	#13
Shroomster '07 to '12:2 wipers to 1? View User's Garage Drives: '12 5-door LE & '14 5-door LE Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Orlando Posts: 1,999	lmao I do that all the time...that sig verification is a joke and a waste of time... so much so I use the chip in the card anymore so I don't have to sign but when I do I just scribble up and down a few times... the last time I did it I colored in nearly the entire electronic pad on a self service register....the clerk had to come over and she didn't even ask for ID!!! she just entered her info and such and gave me the receipt..... hell most places I ask if they want to see my ID or my card and alot of them say no so fuck it.... Last edited by Shroomster; 12-25-2008 at 11:24 PM.

12-26-2008, 01:00 AM	#14
darthbauer Not really here... Drives: 2008 Blazing Blue S hatchback Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: USA Posts: 1,062	I usually just sign my name but when I worked at a retail store back in the day a lot of people on the credit card machines would sign by coloring in the whole box. It was annoying cause it took forever for them to finish. __________________ Liberate Tutemet Ex Infernis.

12-26-2008, 01:09 AM	#15
Kaotic Lazagna View User's Garage Drives: '14 GT86, '08 Vitz Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Central Valley, CA Posts: 9,873	Holy crap, the spaghetti I'm eating just came out of my nose. That's just too funny!

12-26-2008, 10:08 AM	#16
KCALB SIRAY それを吸ってください View User's Garage Drives: black sand lb Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Virginia Posts: 8,894	I sign mine as : Harry P. Ness __________________ http://lifesdailypimpslap.tumblr.com/#me My Build

12-29-2008, 03:47 PM	#17
hatchbackkid82 Drives: . Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: . Posts: 1,828	this was great

12-29-2008, 05:50 PM	#18
nypunk I don't wana be new again Drives: 07 Flint Mica Sedan Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: New York Posts: 35	lol i used to do that to the ups & fed ex guys ... used to do ones like mickey mouse and other fictional characters __________________ Ahh To Be A NOOB Again

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