Does my son deserve a Yaris?

[J.J. Jefferson]

Hey guys I have a serious question. My son, Skipper, is one heck of a kid, well he used to be. Between the ages of 16-19 he was very responsible and respectful. Now he is 20 and seems to have fallen in with the wrong crowd. He has already had a DUI, totalled my truck (2008 Chevy Silverado), and was riding with his friend in a stolen car! Luckily he has been able to avoid any major problems with the authorities.
His 21st birthday is coming up soon and he seems to have taken quite the shine to my new Yaris. He keeps making comments about how he wants one. Should I get him one? In about five years, when he moves out of the house, I don't want him to completely hate me or anything. Thanks guys. :iono:

[SilverBack]

Make him prove to you that he's cleaned-up his act between now and his bday, otherwise it's a no-go for him. He'll have to settle for a used POS and work his way up from there. Also, don't worry about him hating you if you don't buy him the Yaris, it's just a new car. He'll get over it. And when he gets older he'll realize you made the right move just because he didn't. IMO it's the only way kids learn.

[mryaris]

Living with the 'rents until age 26 *and* a free new car? Must be nice.

[H3LlIoN]

Living with the 'rents until age 26 *and* a free new car? Must be nice.

Haha no kidding. And people wonder why we live in an entitlement society full of welfare junkies. My parents bought me my first and only car at 15, and the yaris is my first new car, bought and *being* paid for on my own, at 26.

[J.J. Jefferson]

Well he is waiting on a settlement from a local supermarket. He slipped on a wet floor and injured his back. There was a wet floor sign but it was faded and you could not read the words "wet floor." The store had recently sold him alcohol and he was going back to get more. Now my son has a back injury that will probably never go away. The poor kid has to take a bottle or two a week of pain meds just to be able to function. Don't get me wrong, Im no softy on him but until the settlement is awarded, he has to stay at home. Once he gets his money, he is off to college.
I guess I just felt bad for the kid and wanted to do something nice for him by buying him a Yaris. I find it almost insulting that everyone doesn't own one! But then again, my opinion is going to be a little biased. I appreciate the response. The people on this forum are the best!

[Altitude]

Caveatipse.

[RedRide]

Why do so many parents fear that their children will hate them when all they are trying to do is to be a good parent? Some of these children need a swift kick in the ass... IMO!
A given child might not hate you if you buy him a car but, perhaps they wont respect you (as a parent) either.

Personally, I worked part time when still in jr high school and saved to buy my first (used) car and and no one handed me anything. My parents could have bought me a car but, they wanted me to learn a vauable lenson and realize that I, alone was responsible for my own finances in life. To this day, I thank them for that. :smile:

If he really can't work and you can wll afford it, then perhaps buying him a car is not out of line.
Bottom line, only you know the full extent of your situation.

[J.J. Jefferson]

Why do so many parents fear that their children will hate them when all they are trying to do is to be a good parent? Some of these children need a swift kick in the ass... IMO!
He might not hate you if you buy him a car but, perhaps he wont respect you (as a parent) either.

Personally, I worked part time when still in jr high school and saved to buy my first (used) car and and no one handed me anything. My parents could have bought me a car but, they wanted me to learn a vauable lenson and realize that I, alone was responsible for my own finances in life. To this day, I thank them for that. :smile:

He already doesn't respect me or my wife Bess. He uses foul language, yells at us, etc. I threatened to give him a real grown up a** whoopin one day and the threatened to call the police and then sue me for any damages! I know how it seems but I just think he may be a troubled kid. I know that since I had to go out of work on disability, the one thing that has given me as much happiness is my new Yaris. As for finances, once his settlement is awarded he will probably never need to work for several years. He has assured me that he is going to college though. Thanks for your input on this matter. I may just decide to give him that grown up a** whoopin if he keeps up his antics.
Jeff

[slothman86]

DUI = NO

Oh, If you did your job as a parent. He probably will hate you.

Does he live with you? If so and he treats you like that then you should seriously kick him out. You are responsible for giving him the tools to succeed in life. By the time they are 18 they should be on their own. At least I was.

[RedRide]

I was updating my op while you were you quoting me but, perhaps the frst draft was more suitable?

Evidently, he does need to be taught a lesson before he gets into more serious trouble in life.

[slothman86]

Caveatipse.

LOL! +1

[nemelek]

[QUOTE Should I get him one? In about five years, when he moves out of the house, I don't want him to completely hate me or anything. Thanks guys. :iono:[/QUOTE]

If his like and hate towards you depends on what you do or don't give him, you have already lost the fight.

[J.J. Jefferson]

LOL! +1

Caveatipse. What does that mean? I am new, is there some inside joke or something going on here?

[J.J. Jefferson]

DUI = NO

Oh, If you did your job as a parent. He probably will hate you.

Does he live with you? If so and he treats you like that then you should seriously kick him out. You are responsible for giving him the tools to succeed in life. By the time they are 18 they should be on their own. At least I was.

He still lives at home. He is in the process of waiting on a settlement due to an injury he sustained at a supermarket. He was a great kid until he fell in with the wrong crowd. I really hope that once he goes off to college he will mature some and really refocus his priorities.

[MadMax]

YGBSM! He treats you and your wife like crap, disrespects you and threatens you, and you're contemplating buying or giving him a car? Seriously, what in the hell are you thinking?

If he's over 18 and with that track record, the only thing you need to give him is a swift boot in the ass, the kind that rockets his ass out of your house! Unless he is going to college you have no obligation to keep him under your roof. As a matter of fact, you'd be doing a favor in teaching him a valuable life lesson that his actions have ramifications...

[H3LlIoN]

He already doesn't respect me or my wife Bess. He uses foul language, yells at us, etc. I threatened to give him a real grown up a** whoopin one day and the threatened to call the police and then sue me for any damages! I know how it seems but I just think he may be a troubled kid. I know that since I had to go out of work on disability, the one thing that has given me as much happiness is my new Yaris. As for finances, once his settlement is awarded he will probably never need to work for several years. He has assured me that he is going to college though. Thanks for your input on this matter. I may just decide to give him that grown up a** whoopin if he keeps up his antics.
Jeff


And you're contemplating buying him a car? It's people like your son that ARE the reason I pay so many goddamned taxes. It sounds to me like that giant settlement he's getting for slipping on a wet floor [while intoxicated] should go to his college and living situation. The ONLY thing he deserves is a swift kick in the ass to get him moving. Otherwise, he's going to live in your house, blow the settlement on money and drugs, then limp along in college until he inevitable fails out. Good job, pop. :thumbsup:

[J.J. Jefferson]

YGBSM! He treats you and your wife like crap, disrespects you and threatens you, and you're contemplating buying or giving him a car? Seriously, what in the hell are you thinking?

If he's over 18 and with that track record, the only thing you need to give him is a swift boot in the ass, the kind that rockets his ass out of your house! Unless he is going to college you have no obligation to keep him under your roof. As a matter of fact, you'd be doing a favor in teaching him a valuable life lesson that his actions have ramifications...

He is 20 (going to be 21 soon). He still lives at home, waiting on a settlement. When he gets his money (hopefully soon) he is definitely off to college. He made some mention the other day of taking it easy for a year or two (due to his back injury) before college. I do not think that is too unreasonable but his attitude has to change first. I wanted to buy him a Yaris because it is such a superior vehicle and thought that maybe it would be something we could bond over. This may sound a little over the top but owning a Yaris has really been a life changing event for me.

[H3LlIoN]

Your mind is already made up. Post back in "a year or two" and let us know how this worked out for ya'.




Now that that's over, post some pics of your yaris, and welcome to YW!

[J.J. Jefferson]

And you're contemplating buying him a car? It's people like your son that ARE the reason I pay so many goddamned taxes. It sounds to me like that giant settlement he's getting for slipping on a wet floor [while intoxicated] should go to his college and living situation. The ONLY thing he deserves is a swift kick in the ass to get him moving. Otherwise, he's going to live in your house, blow the settlement on money and drugs, then limp along in college until he inevitable fails out. Good job, pop. :thumbsup:

Sir I respect your opinion but I do not see how my parenting skills are lacking in any way. I show nothing but love and respect for my son as an equal because he is a human being. He is going to go to a good school (either USC or UC Berkley) and hopefully mature. I have threatened him with a kick in the a** before but that would send me to jail. It is a catch 22.

[H3LlIoN]

Honestly, in all seriousness, I really DO hope that that works out for you guys. But I won't be surprised if it doesn't. It was the comment about him cussing and yelling at you that threw me off, plus the part where he threatened to call the cops on you...IN YOUR OWN FRIGGIN' HOUSE!

Now...On to your yaris already! What'didya' get? Pics? I guess, if he does clean up, it would def be cool for you guys to rock a couple yarii...there are a couple hus/wife owners around here, but methinks no father/son...do you guys share an interest in cars? You guys could start a father/son race team...def some action in FL. What degree program he looking at? Those are pretty prestigious schools...

[J.J. Jefferson]

Your mind is already made up. Post back in "a year or two" and let us know how this worked out for ya'.




Now that that's over, post some pics of your yaris, and welcome to YW!

Thanks for the welcome! I really like this place. As soon as I get the opportunity I will post some pics of my Yaris. You will have to bear with me as I am not as computer literate as a lot of people are these days. I only recently found out that there were internet forums dedicated to things like this.

[H3LlIoN]

Haha nice. You can upload pics to www.tinypic.com, they allow hotlinking (posting an outside redirect) and then just post the link here for people. They also resize. Looking forward to pics!

[H3LlIoN]

I only recently found out that there were internet forums dedicated to things like this.

There is also:

www.yariscentral.com
www.microimageonline.com

Plus a number of toyota general forums too.

[J.J. Jefferson]

Honestly, in all seriousness, I really DO hope that that works out for you guys. But I won't be surprised if it doesn't. It was the comment about him cussing and yelling at you that threw me off, plus the part where he threatened to call the cops on you...IN YOUR OWN FRIGGIN' HOUSE!

Now...On to your yaris already! What'didya' get? Pics? I guess, if he does clean up, it would def be cool for you guys to rock a couple yarii...there are a couple hus/wife owners around here, but methinks no father/son...do you guys share an interest in cars? You guys could start a father/son race team...def some action in FL. What degree program he looking at? Those are pretty prestigious schools...

5 door liftback. It is a real dandy of a vehicle. He is all over the road (no pun intended!) about his major: either African American Studies, Urban Studies, or Film Studies. We will see when the time comes. I am going to try to get the pictures of my Yaris and upload them this evening or some time later in the week. I am not very good with computers and new technology stuff. This is the most I have done on the internet, apart from read the news!

[tomato]

Caveatipse.

+1

Nice to meet you. Heard a lot about you :biggrin:

[kac]

Nothing against you or your parenting styles Mr. Jefferson, obviously we don't actually know you or the entire story of your family. But just by reading this thread if I were you I would be thinking about kicking my son out of the house and telling him to act like a grown up, not buying him a car. But maybe I was raised differently than you and yours and maybe we are in completely different environments.

The best of luck with whatever you decide to do.

[yarrr]

next on Dr. Phil, trolls with dysfunctional families and way too much time on their hand.

[ozmdd]

Golly gee! Sure hope those knuckleheads down at the soda fountain don't burn too much rubber in your Yaris while they are pulling some hijinks and monkey-shines! You're a swell dad, Caveatipse!

[MadMax]

BTW, a white pages search revealed no "J.J. Jefferson" living in Lake Panasoffkee, Fl...

[127.0.0.1]

This is Yarisworld not Jerry Springer take this slack-jawed-yokel crap elsewhere plz kthxbye

[YARRis]

I would wait until he's actually enrolled before getting him the car.

[STC]

This is Yarisworld not Jerry Springer take this slack-jawed-yokel crap elsewhere plz kthxbye

LOL! :clap:

[toyo]

Don't spoil him, trust me, it's the worst thing you can do to your kids, he will always say he hates you, but he doesn't mean it lol

[JBougie]

I put myself in my parent's shoes with this post ....... and know what I saw happening if I was your kid, and you were my dad?

I saw him coming downstairs with a belt, telling I'm going to an a** whooping, me threatening to call the cops, him saying "Good - I still have a solid 5 minutes" then my a** becoming one with the belt until the cops getting there. Then, once he gets out of jail the next day I will have my crap packed up and put outside and he will tell me to GTFO.

Your kid doesn't deserve anything. He's a spoiled, entitled brat. With all due respect, I'd feel better if you kept your kid off the road.

[auxmike]

Does anybody buy this?
Skipper...Bess?!
This is so bogus it's actually a great chuckle at best!:clap:
Welcome aboard!

[*MAD DOG*]

Caveatipse. What does that mean? I am new, is there some inside joke or something going on here?

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=captavise

:rolleyes:

[MadMax]

Anyone else notice that "JJ" did a disappearing act shortly after someone accused him of being Caveatipse? Pretty suspicious...

[AND189]

Do what the rest of you yanks do and get him a gun so he can shoot stuff / people

[tomato]

Anyone else notice that "JJ" did a disappearing act shortly after someone accused him of being Caveatipse? Pretty suspicious...

at least he's entertaining, I'll give him that.

[ozmdd]

I really enjoyed all the "parenting advice" folks kept giving, even after it was clear he was a troll. OMG, people are more gullible than I realized!

[CKaelin]

Sounds like he's a junkie and a drunk. Suing a grocery store for slipping on a wet floor? Is this a serious thread? :iono:

[Rain]

You don't deserve to be here. Take your drama somewhere else.

[YarisSedan]

Let me tell you my parents got me my first car when i was 17 and it was a 240sx. It got me into a whole lot of trouble. Totaled the car. I had to take the bus and ride my bike for a year. It made my greatly appreciate having a car. Finally my dad got a new car and gave me his old POS ford escort no power seats, no defroster, no passanger mirror, no radio, no a/c no power steering about as basic as you get. Eventually i saved up enough money to buy my own new car which was my yaris. Parents didnt help me at all and i dont hate them for it. Ever since then i havent got any tickets or when i think about doing something really stupid in my car i think twice about it.

The best thing you can do for him is probally show tough love or he will never learn. He is at that age already where he has to grow up.

[tomato]

I really enjoyed all the "parenting advice" folks kept giving, even after it was clear he was a troll. OMG, people are more gullible than I realized!


As long as people are having fun, and want to throw in their 2 c, nothing wrong with that :iono:

Sounds like he's a junkie and a drunk. Suing a grocery store for slipping on a wet floor? Is this a serious thread? :iono:

people do it every day.

but no, I don't think it's a serious thread. My 2 c ;)

[MadMax]

Tomato old friend...

On conventional keyboards (or in other words, non-laptops), hold down <Ctrl><Alt> and type 1062 on your keyboard, and it will give you a ¢ sign!

The <Num Lock> key must be on!

More special characters here (http://www.forlang.wsu.edu/help/keyboards.asp)!

Being stationed overseas, you learn a lot of these...

Just my 2¢! :biggrin:

Cheers! M2