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There are organizations that help. Lots of people have the problem , it might be useful for you to talk to some other folks face to face that share your compulsion. I didn't used to worry about the hangover, only how good that first drink would feel... Hard problems can be overcome with understanding and diligent application . I believe they call your folks debtors anonymous. It is my strong suggestion that you check them out. You know and admit you have a problem, that is the first and greatest step.
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